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Location: Lake Placid, NY
When my plane touched down in Newark on Monday, I was glad to be home in the U.S. Sure, we have our share of problems, but after spending seven weeks in Norway, I can attest to the fact that all countries have them. I’ve been trying to think of a good story to write about Norway, but the truth is that I lived pretty much the same there as I do here. I wake up, eat, train, eat again, sleep, train some more, eat another time, and go to bed. Whether I am in Maine, Norway, or Siberia, my life is pretty much the same.
There weren’t too many eventful things that happened on my trip, but I did get to know Norway pretty well. Here are two top eight lists for the best and worst things about Norway. Why top eight? Because the top eight in a biathlon race get a prize!
Top Eight Best Things about Norway
8. Skolebrød pastry – Though I think it is Danish in origin, this pastry is still eaten all over Norway. It’s like a cinnamon roll with a custard center, sprinkled with coconut and raw sugar. Unfortunately, I could only have one during my trip. Training…
7. Public transportation – When I arrived in Norway, I was able to take three trains and two busses to get from the airport to a town to get my skis stone-ground, and then to Geilo. All of them connected seamlessly. There are so many busses and trains all over that a car really isn’t needed.
6. Molte – Unique to arctic climates, molte, or mountain cloudberries, is a tasty little golden berry best served inside whipped cream or as a yogurt flavor. It is very sweet, but not bitter like most berries.
5. Skisport on television – On one of my days off, I cooked myself a nice breakfast and kicked back in front of the television to watch a morning of biathlon and all forms of skiing.
4. Hallingbrød – I doubt that there is a people in the world that eats as much bread as the Norwegians. A few slices for breakfast with jam, some more for lunch with meat and cheese, and a few more slices to mop up the gravy for dinner. This specific bread is made of rough milled wheat and rye flour as well as flax seeds and corn.
3. Sunrises and sunsets – Early morning in Norway in the winter is like watching a painting transform on canvas. The horizon goes from navy blue through every shade of blue, red, and yellow before settling on a pale blue. Sunsets are the same, except they transpire in the reverse. Since there is so little daylight in the winter in Norway, every minute is cherished – but the best minutes are at the beginning and end.
2. Mountain ski trails – In the mountains above Geilo, meaning within a twenty minute drive, there are over 200 kilometers of ski trails. Most are just single track trails for classic skiing, but this makes them special since they aren’t like the super-highway trails we use for skating. They all have fantastic views.
1. Snow – The best part about Norway is its snow. When I arrived in late October, there was already enough snow to use good skis. Most years, this type of skiing is possible in mid October. By the end of March, there is a good four foot base in the valley and maybe a twelve to twenty foot base in the mountains. There is still excellent crust skiing through mid May.
Top Eight Worst Things about Norway
8. Peanut butter – I’m a peanut butter lover, so when I arrived in Norway and realized that I’d forgotten my American-made peanut butter, I was devastated. The Norwegian version is bland, hydrogenated, and just horrible.
7. Leverpostei – Maybe the reason the peanut butter is so bad is that Norwegians aren’t very fond of it. Instead, they prefer to spread this nasty concoction on their bread. It literally is made out of chicken or beef liver. It smells even worse than it looks, and it doesn’t look fit for human consumption.
6. Snow removal – This was something I noticed after one of the major snowstorms. Instead of plowing the streets, like in the U.S., they use gigantic snow blowers in Norway. Not only does this spell danger if you are in the path of one of these machines, which are towed by farm tractors, but they don’t even work. About an inch of snow is left on the roads to turn to ice when the temperature inevitably climbs and falls around the freezing point. Without metal studs, driving or even walking is life endangering.
5. Raw fish – Fish is something I like. It’s healthy and it tastes good. But only if it’s cooked. In Norway, especially on the coast, they eat a hefty amount of fish that is raw, smoked, salted, or even aged (i.e. rotten). They also have pickled fish and a sauce made of caviar and mayonnaise that they put on bread.
4. West wind – The best thing about Norway is snow, but one of the worst things is when that snow melts. When the wind blows from the west off the North Sea, it brings rain and warm temperatures. Not good for skiing.
3. Taxes, taxes – Somewhere, I read that Norway is the most taxed people in the world. Income and property taxes are a bit higher than in the U.S., but the dreaded sales tax stands at a daunting 22 percent. Sure, they get inexpensive health care, welfare, and great retirement benefits, but when you are a foreign biathlete, Norway is an expensive trip.
2. Weekends on the ski trails – It is great that so many people in Norway ski, but every weekend, usually in the middle of my intensity workouts, a horde of locals and tourists would hit the race trails for their weekend outing. One thing about American skiers that I now appreciate is that they move out of the way when they hear someone behind them thrashing the snow and breathing overly hard. Norwegians take the passive approach: “We know you’re there, but since you’re such a good skier, we’ll let you try to get around us. Consider it training.” Sometimes it became a bit ridiculous, like in Beitostølen, when it seemed like the locals were trying to create human chains across the trail to keep the athletes from getting through. They would watch us coming towards them from a distance, but make no movement whatsoever that would help prevent a collision. Maybe they just trust in their free health care…
1. Post office – The absolute worst thing about Norway is its post office. I have had nightmare encounters with the people there every time I go inside to send something. Four years ago, my skis arrived a few days before Christmas at the post office from Rossignol. They sent me a note telling me to pick them up. I went about a half-hour before they were scheduled to close. The woman was already starting to lock-up, so I hurried to the door. She saw me and ran to the door to lock it before I could get in! She looked at me and turned around. Because I was flying to Finland the next day, I knew that I had to get my skis. I started pounding on the doors and windows. I could see the woman in the back, a little frightened by me, this seventeen year old American. I pointed to the opening hours, and she gave me a blank stare. Finally, she gave in and opened the door. I gave her the slip of paper and less than a minute later, she brought me my skis. Outrageous. The work ethic in that post office is about as solid as kids on the last day of school.
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